Month: January 2022

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Let’s Get Back to You

There oughta be someone you can call to help you with that.

Look, it’s not like the pandemic created this problem. Difficulty leaving work on time, leaving work at work, and leaving work out of our dreams has been a top issue for my clients from the first moment I had a client. In fact, it was the first thing I wanted help with from my first coach. Why is it so hard to just stop?

The companies we work for, the language from the top, and the messages from the managers we report to – along with the examples they set – all contribute both positively and negatively. Like diversity, commitment to employee welfare and boundaries is something you can’t just talk about once and call it good. Companies need to send consistent messaging through words, actions, and examples to be effective. Then – they have to do it again and again and again. If possible, I’d like them to do it without my having to join an ERG to prove it’s important.

But what if your company’s overload plumbing is a bit… out of order? Does that mean you’re stuck with the overflow of work? The continual back-up of things to do?

Not at all. You, my friend, possess mad plumbing skilz. And if you don’t, I’m here to help.

Here’s how to reach me, else, carry on for 5 things you can do to unplug fast and stay loose.

If you’re suffering from overwhelm and would like to work with me, sign up for a free consultation. Let’s see if I can help. Schedule that here.

If you’re out of work, or working on the health care front lines and would like to see if coaching helps, it’s my honor to assist you for free. Schedule that here.

Heard about my 6 week course – Reboot your day job? – Find out more here.

  • Number 5: Remember why you took this job. I’m pretty sure it wasn’t to slowly boil yourself in work. Whatever that reason was, it’s likely that it’s not the same reason you work late. Let’s say you took the job you have so that you could get to work on full stack projects. OK. Now ask yourself – do you get to work on full stack projects? At all? If the answer is no, you’ve got a different problem. If the answer is yes, then ask yourself if took the job work on full stack projects day and night. Hint: The answer is no. Sometimes this exercise alone is enough to re-set your perspective on those long nights and make it easier to just … log off.
  • Number 4: Leave earlier than you dare to. Clients often try to just leave a half hour earlier. Turns out there’s not enough upside to that small change to actually motivate you to endure the discomfort you’ll feel the first week you unplug. So go big. Leave on time, on the dot. Leave early enough to actually enjoy your day.
  • Number 3: For goodness sake – PLAN something at quitting time. Do not leave this up to your own brain. It is just going to ask if you don’t want to do five more emails, finish one more task, or worse yet, plop on the couch for reruns of Law & Order until you wish you were back at your desk. Plan something wonderful. Take a class, dig out a hobby, or just play a card game. Whatever it is, make sure it’s better than work.
  • Number 2: Prepare for the discomfort. You’ve established a pattern with yourself and others. For the first week, it’s going to be a bit uncomfortable. You’ll wonder what people think about you… working your eight hours and leaving. You’ll feel funny ghosting all those pinging IM’s from your co-workers. You’ll worry about keeping up. Have a plan for this. Use Tech to give everyone the 411: Clearly set your status – I’m gone. Call if it’s urgent – see you in the AM. Block your calendar as “out of the office” in the evening so people with flexible schedules don’t book you for meetings. Breathe. This is scary but it just might be the most invigorating thing you’ll do all year.

And now, the Number One Way to Stop Working On Time –

Tell your boss. You heard me. Walk or Zoom into his office and tell him you’re trying an experiment. You don’t think it will cause him any issues, but you just want to let him know. You’ll be logging off – on time – for two weeks. Tell him you want to hear from him if this is a problem. And then? Follow through.

And that? Is just the beginning.

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Twenty Twenty, too?

Feel like you’re in a spin cycle? Finding the next step is sometimes about finding the right do-over.

Big shout out to all of you Monday Warriors out there. Today I want to blog about how to know if you should keep on doing something. And I’m not talking about the pandemic, but, kinda, I am.

We often spend time in January thinking about what we want to change, what we want to fix or accomplish in the year ahead. That’s not the same as looking at the totality of your life and asking what should stay and what should go. Julie Morgenstern, in “Time Management from the Inside Out” proposed that we look at time the way we look at a closet… as a fixed volume that we need to decide how to fill.

Sometimes we have to clean out our closets, discarding what we don’t use, in order to fit in what we want to have handy. Time is like that, too.

I’ve found the best way to know if we want to keep doing something, is to stop. Just stop. Let go of it. Then look at how you filled that time. Do you like the changes? Are you better off? Do you long to add it back to your life again?

The pandemic did that for us. A lot of things stopped. Things like dining out, commuting, and throwing out used PPE.

What stopped for you? What were you doing in 2019 that you are no longer doing? What are you filling that time with? How is this new normal working for you?

One thing that stopped for me in 2020 was my volunteer work at our local hospital. My therapy dog has now passed and I don’t have an easy way back to that work. Looking back, I gained connection and meaning from those Sunday visits to patients. That’s something I want to add back. That’s a pretty good do-over goal.

What have you added to your life during the pandemic? Make a list. What do you want to keep and what should you toss back?

I added worry about politics. I’d like to toss that back.

I also added 8 hours solid sleep each night. That’s a keeper.

What about you?

What, if you stopped doing it today, would you never miss? Cookie Cats Bubble Pop comes to mind. Fretting over my annual review is another. Time to take a serious look at those things.

When you list out the things you were doing, that you would like to restart, think about the components that made those activities special. My current dog will never be allowed in a hospital, but I can recreate some of what made my volunteer gig special, by finding a new one that directly connects me to other people in an open, non-judgemental way. Something where I can speak to and see the person I’m helping, that’s what I miss. Something that broadens my perspective. I can have a do-over on that.

So before you give up on January, before you go all-in on 2022 – see if you can find a better do-over and a few old things to toss out so you can fit in a better do-over.

And that? Is just a good way to start the year.