Burnout isn’t a four letter word. It’s a seven letter word that can be fixed by another sever letter word – friends. Shawn Achor writes about his research on this topic in his book “The Happiness Advantage”. He found that during times of challenge and stress, the students who pulled back and upped their social connections fared better academically. The example he gives is students who, when faced with a challenging semester, organized group study activities with peers versus students who isolated themselves and crammed alone.
We tend to reduce our social connections when faced with stress and challenging demands, because, well, who has time?
As counter-intuitive as it sounds, reaching out to other people could be the action we’re better off taking. For instance, I can’t count the number of times, when faced with a challenging code problem, simply explaining the issue to a person unfamiliar with the project, led to finding the solution. When we explain or teach something to others, we clarify it for ourselves.
Here’s another example – as we work late into the evening, our ability to quickly turn out good work starts to fade, we grow fatigued, we make mistakes. Disconnecting and spending time with a loved one, reduces stress, increases happiness and that makes creative thinking easier. (For more, see my earlier blog.)
There’s a backlash effect that can happen when you chose to spend time with family despite heavy work demands. When we’re used to grunting it out in isolation, working longer and longer, with less and less to show for it (see this blog for more) – it can feel wrong to spend time with family on the weekend.
Avoiding burn out, in my experience, requires a strategy that insists on honoring our own needs and limits, supporting our decisions once they are made, and making conscious choices to invest in our relationships, even when we have a lot to do.
This looks like getting enough sleep, stopping when we’re tired, prioritizing the most important relationships in our lives and then not blaming ourselves for doing these things.
Bottom Line? During times of stress:
- Don’t isolate, socialize
- Don’t overwork – seek out family and friends
- And for goodness sake, don’t indulge in guilt after the fact.
Never miss a blog. Sign up here for my Monday morning newsletter – “It’s Monday”. You’ll get information about new programs and offers, links to interesting videos and books all in your inbox.