Showing Up & Getting Started – Part 2

It’s a big deal, setting a goal. Well, kinda. After all, if you swear off food and have a pizza all on the same day, that can be the end of it, right? If you commit to inbox zero on January first and crawl out of the office on Friday the fourth with your ten most important emails still unanswered, it’s time to quit, right? Your brain thinks so. I can guarantee it.

Your brain is a brilliant thing but it’s a bit divided. It’s got a whole complex system designed and focused on doing what feels good now, will not hurt and is super easy. Right. You got it. It wants fast food, that you’ve had before, preferably delivered. It wants to answer the one hundred unimportant emails and leave those ten really intense ones for another day. Why? Because deleting an email gives you a little hit of dopamine, a little bit of “feels great”. And the easy ones, well you know, they’re easy. And the important ones… it kinda hurts just to think about focusing on reading all that and making a BIG decision. You might get your answer wrong and that could hurt you.

Get it?

So here you are, New Year’s day… setting your goal for the year. Drop some poundage, exercise more, leave work on time, empty your inbox, get that promotion. What. Ever.

See that’s the key. It absolutely does not matter what goal you set. The next thing your brain is going to do is decide your goal is the wrong goal. Bad idea. Impossible. See, you failed already. Just quit! Why? Because having a goal is the opposite of super easy.

Your brain is way smart.

Our brains got us here, as species, by conserving energy. Always on the look out for the most efficient way of getting us over the evolutionary goal line – birth, procreate, die as old as possible -the brain is always looking for the most calories for the least amount of effort, the quickest way to the water hole, the best way to stay part of the tribe, the easiest way to do the least amount of work. It’s beautiful, except if you want to do something hard. Then, your standard issue brain is a problem.

Good thing you have an executive in your head.

What? No, the VP of marketing isn’t in there with you. It’s your executive functions, cognitive processes needed for goal attainment and other stuff. That’s the part of the brain that plans, uses your working memory and basically would like to run the show. However, it’s not that simple. Your prefrontal cortex sets up plans but if you aren’t monitoring what that other section of the brain is getting up to, your mid brain is going to stage a coup.

So – If you’re having trouble with your new year’s resolution already, nothing has gone wrong. Everything is perfectly normal and your mid-brain is functioning A-OK.

OK – sure but what about that goal?

1. Recognize it’s normal for your mid-brain to bail on a goal.
2. Refuse to allow it to talk you into giving up.
3. Monitor the thoughts you are having about your goal – are these helping you?
4. Decide you are going to try again, every day if needed, until you acheive your goal.

Step 2, that’s the key right? But it’s not immediately apparent how to do it. Next Monday… how to get around your mid brain and jazz yourself up for keeping going.

See, you might make February with that goal after all.